When your portfolio’s split between moonshots and meltdowns, the ‘Weekly ETF’ box might just decide your mood for the next seven days.
Week 2 — Still Juicy, Slightly Bruised: Portfolio Slips to $9,560 but Keeps Paying
Date: October 29, 2025
Welcome back to the High-Yield ETF Experiment, where we're learning that "passive income" is a myth perpetuated by individuals who don't regularly check their portfolios (okay, hourly).
Week 2 just wrapped, and spoiler alert: the math is technically bad, but the dopamine hits keep coming. Our portfolio declined by 4.4%, but we still received $179.33 in dividend income. It's like your car's check engine light came on, but at least the radio still works.
The Numbers For the Week
Metric | Value |
|---|---|
Starting Value | $10,000.00 |
Current Value (as of 10/29/25) | $9,560.23 |
Weekly Change | –4.40% |
Dividends Received This Week | $179.33 |
Net Return (Price + Dividends) | –2.61% |
Translation: We're bleeding, but we're bleeding income.
Distribution Breakdown (Approx.)
Type | Amount | % of Total | Est. Tax Impact | Reinvested Shares (DRIP) |
|---|---|---|---|---|
Ordinary Income | $107.60 | 60% | Taxable (~22% rate) | ~0.7 avg per fund |
Return of Capital | $53.80 | 30% | Reduces cost basis | — |
Short-Term Gains | $17.93 | 10% | Taxable at the ordinary rate | — |
Total Distributed | $179.33 | 100% | — | All reinvested weekly |
(Percentages estimated from YieldMax and Granite disclosures.)
The IRS is already sharpening its pencil. That $78 in estimated taxes? Yeah, the government gets paid before you do—feature, not a bug.
Cumulative Performance (Two Weeks In)
Metric | Value |
|---|---|
Starting Capital | $10,000 |
Current Portfolio Value | $9,560.23 |
Total Dividends Received (Weeks 1 + 2) | $363.41 |
Net Gain/Loss Incl. Dividends | –$76.36 (–0.76%) |
S&P 500 (VOO) — Same Period | +1.1% |
JEPI (Income ETF) — This Week | +0.4% (est.) |
Taxes Accrued Est. | $78 @ 22% rate |
Reality Check: We're underwater versus a boring index fund. But hey, at least we have stories to tell.
Fund-Specific Play-by-Play
TSLY (Tesla) —Up ~2%, channeling Elon's energy into "cautious acceleration mode." Delivery concerns eased after the earnings, but options writers still had a solid week amid the cooldown in volatility.
MSTY (MicroStrategy) — Down ~3% as Bitcoin consolidated around $107k-110k. For a company that's basically a Bitcoin ETF in tech clothing, holding the line in choppy waters counts as a win.
UTLY, YMAX, COYY, XBTY —The supporting cast. Flat to slightly positive, still churning out distributions like reliable middle-management employees. No drama, no surprises. Sometimes that's the move.
Provider News: Crickets. All systems nominal. Sometimes boring is a blessing.
Red Flags & Observations
Status | Observation |
|---|---|
🟡 | Portfolio down 4.4% — typical for high-yield in choppy markets, but feels bad when you refresh every 47 seconds. |
🟢 | Dividends crushing it — 1.8% of capital returned in a single week (annualize that and... actually, don't) |
🔴 | Break-even reality check: We need the portfolio to stay above ~$9,820 to break even, even with all dividends reinvested. If we dip below $9,500, the total return goes permanently negative. Another week like this and we're not just bleeding—we're hemorrhaging. |
Market Context (Why We're Getting Punched)
Crypto Theater: Bitcoin spent the week bouncing between $109k and $115k—impressive numbers, terrible vibes. After hitting an all-time high of $124k on October 3rd, BTC gave back gains as Powell reminded everyone the Fed isn't your friend. COYY and XBTY holders watched their six-figure dreams oscillate like a heart monitor. Spoiler: It flatlined on the 29th with a 5% single-day drop.
Tesla Turbulence: Down modestly after Q3 earnings on October 22nd showed revenue growth but an EPS miss (50¢ vs 54¢ expected) and net income down 37% YoY. TSYY mirrored the ambivalence—stock's still up 78% over the past year, but "high yield" in this case meant "hold this while we digest mixed signals." Delivery momentum is improving, but margin compression is the plot twist nobody ordered.
Broader Market: Nasdaq and S&P 500 didn't implode—they hit fresh all-time highs. The S&P closed above 6,800 for the first time (6,875 on Oct 28), and the Nasdaq touched 23,958 on Oct 29. Translation: October is peak earnings season (not September—blame the typo on pre-gym brain fog), and everyone's cautiously euphoric. Volatility is a chef's kiss for option sellers (us!) but very rude for anyone who bet against Big Tech before the Oct 30 post-earnings bloodbath.
Weekly Realizations (AKA Hard Truths)
Income is not immunity. That $179 dividend doesn't matter if the portfolio loses $440. Math is undefeated.
High-yield ETFs move with momentum. Tesla sneezes, TSYY gets pneumonia. Bitcoin belches, XBTY takes it personally. You're not buying a bond—you're buying lottery tickets with coupons.
DRIP is slow power. Adding 0.7 shares per fund per week sounds impressive until you realize we'll need about 847 weeks to recover at this rate. That's 16 years. Your DRIP is really more of a drizzle.
Reader Question
Should we track it as:
"Cumulative Dividends vs. Portfolio Value" (the victory lap vs. the bloodbath)?
"Yield on Cost Trend" (watching our real return percentage shift as the cost basis changes)?
Drop your vote in the comments. This experiment is for data-driven income hunters, by people who are addicted to spreadsheets and minor heart palpitations.
What's Next
Chart requests for Week 3:
Running total of dividends reinvested (see: the slow bleed)
Head-to-head vs. S&P 500 and JEPI (spoiler: we're losing)
Next update: November 5, 2025
The Verdict: The yields are juicy. The drawdowns are real. The tax bill is definitely real. But somehow, we're still here, watching it all unfold, one $179 dividend at a time.
Stay tuned. The experiment continues, and so does our ability to pretend this is normal.